Sleepless night and a bad day...

Another sleepless night last night. Yeah, I played Neopets a lot, but only because I couldn't sleep. I moved the laptop into the living room and determined not to put it back in the bedroom...I did that Tuesday I think it was. It didn't help much, but at least when I went to bed I wasn't tempted to reach out for the laptop when I couldn't sleep, and I did eventually fall asleep around 5 a.m. this morning. It being Saturday, the kids kept waking me up, although they tried not to.

Jared and Katie started back to school Wednesday. I really got blue over that. For the past two weeks, they've been at each other's throats...I couldn't WAIT for school to start, and of course now I'm missing them terribly. I went to the doctor Tuesday because I hadn't slept more than maybe 6 hours total in the past 3 weeks. He prescribed my bipolar meds for me again, but the stupid insurance company is saying we HAVE to do them mail order, 90-day supply at a time. Well, he started me on a LOW dose until I get used to them again, and so he only prescribed a 30-day supply. He won't change it, and the insurance company is still fighting us. UGH. I don't blame the doctor, he KNOWS what he's doing. But I've been off these meds since Katrina hit and I ran out and couldn't get a new prescription. I didn't go back on them sooner because of the issues I've had with my liver this year (that'll be another post too!!!).

I want to cut myself again, but so far I've managed to stay out of the kitchen. I don't remember actually cutting myself, but I do know the signs...like I think about it when I see a knife...I almost couldn't use a knife to cut my sandwiches just now. The only reason I was able to was because I waited until Justin came into the kitchen. As it is, I had to get him to cut up my roast beef for me. I really need to be back on my meds.

Watching Playhouse Disney probably isn't helping me lol. Bekah has control of the TV this morning...DoodleBops is on...she hated it when they first put it on a couple years ago, but now that she's almost 4 she loves it. I'll never understand a pre-schooler's tastes...