The blog that is. I'm determined to do better. You can blame work, stress, World of Warcraft, whatever, but I'm determined to get this thing going again. It really was helping to express my thoughts. I can't really say vocalize since I'm not "talking" here but anyway, you get my drift.
What's going on. Lets see. Dad almost died a couple weeks ago. I had a surprise pregnancy and a not-such-a-surprise miscarriage a couple weeks later. I go to the doctor this week (again) and we'll discuss hysterectomy. Not sure if I'm going to go through with it or not. I WANT to be able to not have to worry about going through this crap yet again, but at the same time, its incredibly sad.
Oh Dad. He went in for some biopsies of his prostate, and got a really serious bacterial infection. He got septic and was in ICU for almost a week. Of course, during all this time, the prison didn't let anyone know what was going on because of security reasons. They're moving him to the camp soon, which doesn't even have a fence and only one guard at a time, and they couldn't even let us know he was in the hospital, ALONE, fighting for his life. GAH. I talked to him yesterday and he seemed to be in good spirits and sounded well, so I'm praying he'll be ok. He said the doctors said it'd be months before he regains his strength, and currently he's still in a wheelchair.
Work is going well. I'm being rotated between Customer Service and cashiering, and Saturday I was working Money Center too because Elaine got fired. I'm hoping that I can either go full-time MC, full-time CS, or a combination of the two, and just go cashier when they're really backed up. Yep, the pain is once again an issue.
I'm really getting worn down. I want to crawl into a hole and hide most days, but I somehow manage to keep plugging along. I have one hell of a husband. Not many men would put up with this.
Jared tried to kill himself at school earlier this month. He spent almost a week in Pine Grove and is on meds and in therapy now. Unfortunately, his dad is probably going to fight me on custody. He's pushing for him to come live with him, and for him to come out for the entire summer, but I'm not willing to agree to that. For one thing, he needs to be in therapy and not get uprooted from that while he's making progress. For another, its not fair to ME to not get to see him when he's not in school. I rarely get the "fun times" with the kids...Blane does. He gets to be the fun parent, because of course the kids behave with him...they rarely get to see him. Justin and I have to be the disciplinarians, and that's never any fun.
Off to make "Belle" take her nap. I guess I'll let her nap in her costume if she wants...anything to get her to sleep, right?
